5 Second Ideas

    Sometimes I have a 5 second joke idea. A 5 second joke is a joke that is hilarious for around 5 seconds. An example is a parody of Celebrity Fit Club, Celebrity Book Club. Even a parody of American Idol, called American Idol would be funny visually if it has a picture of Jesus, a golden calf, Vishnu and L. Ron Hubbard getting voted off. These things are great for a giggle but can be ruined if you try to expand them. Recently I've been having problems with convincing myself that some of my 5 second jokes would be genius if expanded on. This of-course is part of writer's disillusion. Here is an example of a 5 second joke expanded into shittyness.  

        I am not a conspiracy nut. I do not believe the government has steady contact with aliens and are trading humans for UFO technology. I also do not believe that one group of people rule the entire world from a hotel in the Netherlands. Such conspiracies are silly, easily dismissed and easily proven wrong.  What I do believe in is real. It's a lie that has been passed down generation to generation in each family for as long as man has walked this earth with their knuckles off the ground. I am of-course referring to the conspiracy of the female menstrual cycle.

        The menstrual cycle was invented by a woman whose named has been lost from the cave paintings. It was around the time of the wheel and the fire. The time of cavemen doing cavemen things, like raping women and taking them by the hair as their wives. This brave woman one night said something like, "not tonight sweetheart, I'm bleeding... there" but probably not in english. She continued the lie for a few more days and then told her friends about it. When the men questioned why all the women suddenly were bleeding... there, the women told them that they have always done that, and they used to do it while the men went hunting. The men bought it and we have been buying it ever since.
    
        The lie was added upon over time. As we evolved into more civil beings that could farm, communicate through writing, but still beat our women, women decided to add that they can not be held accountable for what they say or do while they are on their period. This is when women all over the world started being bitchy a week out of the month and men started passing the fear of the time of blood to their offspring. This lie has been used in many court casing of women killing men. I have no problem with this as seeing I believe in killing most of the competition.
   
        I will have my day of King toffer, the last man on earth, lover of all beautiful women who love his big (by default) penis.  
   
        Other lies added to the menstrual cycle...
   

    That is as far as I got with the idea before I became bored with it and realize that at best it could be a 10 second joke or even throw away dialogue.